Pause and a take a deep breath. Inhale for four counts and exhale for another four counts. Hope you’re feeling a little better, dear bride-to-be. The feelings of overwhelm amidst wedding planning is totally normal! Remember, you’re not alone in this journey! Many brides have been through, and are still going through, the emotional wedding planning rollercoaster.

You’ve heard the term “Bridezilla.” What does it mean exactly? Usually, this not-so-pleasant descriptor means a bride-to-be is becoming a little too controlling over every tiny detail of her wedding. It’s your way or the high way, simply put. Of course no one ever wants to be called a bridezilla. It hurts! It feels like you’re being judged when you’re just really overwhelmed by all the decisions you need to make.

Let’s talk about what some people might perceive as Bridezilla qualities. And we’ll also throw in a couple of tips to help you manage that wedding planning stress!

A sign that your patience is thinning out is when you find yourself getting irritated much quicker than usual, maybe even raising your voice a little higher than you intended.

What you can do instead: First of all, don’t be too hard on yourself. We’re human. We get angry. But before you speak and probably say something you’ll regret to a loved one or a supplier, pause and think. That space between what triggered you and responding will give you more clarity and breathing room. Remember, you can’t always control the actions of others but you can control how you react. Always choose grace at this time!

Every “inspiration” or “idea” you see online makes you question whether your original plan is good enough. The thoughts spiral and suddenly you’re sending a message to your coordinator at 3AM about a few changes you want to make with the styling, venue, program flow, and so on…

What you can do instead: Put the phone down. Close all those tabs. Take a walk outside. Move your body. Go on a date with your soon-to-be. Ideas from online sources are helpful and all but when they start making you doubt your own choices, it’s time to take a break. Not all “inspo” is good inspo. Take only the ideas that are genuinely meaningful for you and your partner. The rest are just unnecessary! Always ask yourself: Do we really need this? Will this truly make us happy on our big day?

You’ve found yourself editing your seating chart for the tenth time this week. You’ve been “checking-in” with your coordinator nearly every hour of every day. While it’s normal to care about the details, being too in control of every single element might mean you’re holding on too tightly.

What you can do instead: Try delegating. Trust your team. You hired them for a reason. Share your vision clearly, then give them the freedom to bring it to life. And if things don’t go exactly as planned? That’s okay. Don’t lose sight of the bigger picture: Marrying the love of your life! At the end of all the hustle and hassle, that’s what matters.

You want your parents to be happy, your entourage to feel comfortable, your guests to be wowed, your suppliers to be impressed… And somewhere along the way, you forgot yourself. Suddenly, your wedding is about everyone else’s happiness and not yours. You get too lost in the details that you forget to take each moment in as a special one. Take this as a sign that it might be time to re-center.

What you can do instead: It’s okay to honor family and friends, but not at the expense of your own happiness. Revisit your non-negotiables as a couple. What really matters to you two? Align your decisions with that, and the right people will understand. You’re allowed to prioritize joy over people-pleasing.

You’ve done so much, but instead of feeling accomplished, you’re just more anxious. Maybe you’re thinking, “Is this too simple?”, “Is this even Instagram-worthy?”, or “What if our guests don’t enjoy it?”

What you can do instead: Take a deep breath again, bride. It’s not about perfection. It’s about meaning. Set your focus not on how the day looks, but on how it feels. Create memories, not pressure. Celebrate love, not just aesthetics.

At the end of the day, you’re doing your best. That already makes you a wonderful bride and not a Bridezilla. Acknowledge all the feelings, the frustration included. But remember to be kind to yourself! Hold your emotions with compassion. When things get tough, lean on your loved ones for support, most especially your partner. Remember what all this planning is for in the first place: Being with the one you love forever!

You’ve got this, dear bride. We’re rooting for you!